Whatever Happened to Baby Jade

Ooooooo i'm tired!!

Today was a fun-filled day of doing stuff for once!!First Lucy and Suzanne photographed their work for the powerpoint presentation in the photography studio then we powerpointed all of the photos which took less than nine seconds, and it was quite good to actually be doing something for once!*sneeze*Alex (tutor) gave me back my CD with Whatever Happened to Baby Jade (music video for photograph [which will be posted on my profile after it's debut tomorrow morning]) with a strip of masking tape stuck to it with "Improve? Show for aement." each '' representing an 's' (I presume anyway). I was tempted to put "NO?" after 'Improve?' but then I found out that he was only concerned as to what i'd be doing for the next two days before our critique.Well it turns out I did a little directing for an original The Ring-esque film for Lu & Su's second video (after their first videos just broke completely). Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! It was way funny, we were filming in Room 106, which is like the best room to film anything ever, and there's a little flight of stairs down to a door which leads into the Contact Course Room and Lucy was lain down the flight of stairs in a deliberately spacazoid way as to look as if she'd fallen (off the one step) and broke her legs, neck and several other vital bones while surrounded by juggling balls (a key feature in this film later christened 'Disturbia'). Haaaaaa we were so worried that someone in the contact course was going to wonder what the noise through the door was and open up to see Lucy collapsed, helpless down the steps haaaaaa, god that was funny.And my damn camera kept saying "Change Batteries" So I ran to le bibliotheque and they didn't have any, was pointed in the direction of Marie's and so quickstepped there and back with a pack of four batteries only to find they didn't work in the camera..Haaaaaaa, and while we were discovering the batteries were broke Lucy was meanwhile splitting her spline on the corners of the steps, haaaaaa. ANYWAY, it turned out the original batteries were going to survive for a while longer (as I was extra kind to them) and we continued to film.Ohhhh it's a good film, Lucy looks uber creepy in it! Oh my god, I desperately need to find the sound of white noise from somewhere! That will literally set the video off to amazement. It screams Japanese horror from the originals of The Ring and The Grudge. Ha, it lasts like, two minutes and has no sound, even though it's meant to last fifteen SECONDS and be a music video. God I loved filming it. Being a director is way fun!!! I have the only copy (apart from the original on my computer account in college) right next to me on disc! It's way cool! Okay i'll stop going on about it! (Disturbia will also debut tomorrow morning and so can't talk about it now!!)But yes, we stayed sitting at the computer until half four and I had to like powerwalk to the bus haaa.My throat is way saw!Oooo looking forward to tomorrow night! Will be ace!!

Oh my god, that's if it doesn't snow TOO MUCH!!

Way tired

Loadsa

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Pirates and Cubicles

Ohhhhh Emmmmmmmmmmmm Jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Last night was actually HILARE.*WHINE* why are all of my nails breaking?! I seriously need like, more health.It was so funny when we were collecting Alithea, because my phone went off just as we were pulling up to her house, it was James asking if I was going to the party that night, then the radio in the car suddenly blasts on and I’m screaming for it to be turned down, then I’m trying to get out of the car without being run over, then I was knocking on the door and trying to talk to James and Alithea’s dad at the same time. God, I must’ve seemed rude being on the phone. Ha, Alithea and I must’ve looked tres funny as Princess Fiona from Shrek and a typical pirate haha!Jess looked stunning in her white dress, I hope she had a wonderful Birthday party! Those photos of her on the screen in the foyer were sooooo cute!! It was a great party – I like going to parties where there are only a few people I know, gives me a chance to socialize quite a lot! It was way a cool party!Ha, going up the bouncy castle was a nightmare! I did it just the once, and when I got off I was like uber out of breath – I am so unbelievably unfit it was funny.But yes, I swear to god I didn’t drink that much at the party! And yet, I have never been so drunk in my entire life and I’m still feeling the effects. I’ll recount what I had! (I have two amazing talents of, no matter how drunk I get, I always remember everything and never have hangovers) To start off I had a cocktail Alithea invented, which, from this moment forward is being called Aleetho Juice, it was 99% cranberry juice (which I ADORE) and a literal splash of vodka. Thinking about it that’s vodka and cranberry… but still! That was way nice. Okay I just remembered what I did drink, and maybe I did drink quite a bit… Okay, major note to myself: Never mix your drinks EVER again. I always tell myself not to, and I always do it. Okay maybe I won’t recount the drinks I had; it makes me feel queasy.Ha, James noticed I had my ear pierced; his expression was so hilare. Oh my god, Alithea on the bouncy castle just seemed like the funniest thing in the entire world, HAAAAA, it was just when she dismounted, it was like a gymnast dressed as Princess Fiona, oh god it was funny! I was laughing WITH you Alf!!God, I literally just went to the loos for something to do, and locked myself in a cubicle then kind of… thought the floor looked inviting, and ended up sitting on it for god knows how long, nearly falling asleep (it must’ve been one of those times when drink makes me narcoleptic). Then apparently someone said that I was passed out in the loos and so came a torrent of at least nineteen thousand people coming in and asking if I was okay, haa. Then there was one voice I didn’t think I’d hear that night – Michael Fish’s! Five seconds later the cubicle door was open and I was literally being dragged out on the floor and out onto the dance floor. Ha, the macarena was funny, I was so out of time and I’d completely forgotten the steps and Mr Lambert was taking photos haaaa, was so funny.I also remember, while being in the cubicle, two boys named Ben talking to me, making sure I wasn’t “passing out and subsequently dying”, because I told them I hadn’t eaten and that I was anorexic… Only the latter didn’t sound like much of a joke this time and so they got me bread to eat, which they slid under the door but naturally was left untouched seeing as it was on the floor of a public toilet.Omg, I seriously need to stop biting my nails!! Need to get the nail kit.Um, I think that’s about it for the party report! Just texting James about it. I hope I wasn’t too scandalous, and I would like to apologize if I was.

Thanks for a great great party!!

Lubs!!!!!!!!!!!!XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Old Friends and Silver Studs

Well, today indeed was a very VERY good one, god I enjoyed myself, the first Saturday in at least sixteen hundred years that I've done so.Mother was at work today, which is unusual! And so I walked upt 'own by myself, it was sunny, and I was merry! I got forty out of the bank - for my phone bill and other such, but ended up spending it all on pretty things.Wandering past Sirius I thought, pivetted, went back and went in and got my left ear lobe pieced with a nice plain silver stud (as the others were like dia-mont-ays which just screech 'David Beckham!!'). Then I waltzed up the street, buying little niceties, visited mother in le magasin, walked back down, about to browse in Oxfam when a girl opened the door to come out and it was Jess Adshead! A very dear friend of mine from god, um, must be about eight years since I last saw her. We stopped and talked for a while, she is still, such a wonderful person, she is totally my muse, she has hardly changed at all, slightly more grown up and prettier, but she commented on my having changed a lot and she wouldn't have recognized me if it wasn't for the pictures of me on Bebo! It just rounded my day off fantastically. Was way on a high after.Then I went into Burtons (that shows how good a mood I was in) and tried on a thirty-six waist jean and they fit! Perfectly fine! (I usually take a thirty-eight) God, by this time I was like the OOBER happy. But I wanted skinny jeans! And naturally, Burtons only do the basic menswear, which is like, jeans, bootcut jeans, a hoodie, a hoodie with a logo and a t-shirt, so I didn't find any in there :( And so I went to the other side of the shop, aka Dorothy Perkins and got some from there. I fit into a size sixteen jean! Haaaa! God, they are WAY skinny. I love them. I am totally taking Lucy's advice and wearing them with my cowboy booties over the top. Ha, the mens' changing room (not plural) aka, an actual cupboard was closed for some reason so I had to use the ladies changing room and I could hear what this girl was saying to her mother, it was hilare. The girl was like "This is

really nice!" mother: "What size is it?" "A twelve." "Then it won't fit! I'm trying on eights and tens and you're trying on a twelve and you're smaller than me!" "But I want it!" "No you don't!" "YES i do!" "Do you have money?!" "Yes!!" "FINE! Get it!" "...I need to borrow a fiver." "...How much is it?" "...a fiver."God mens' changing rooms are so hystare, the one in Pritchards I literally didn't know was there, as it just looks like a door that leads to like the staff room or something, but it actually lead into a like metre square room with a picture on the wall, and I swear to god, I was trying on something in there and I leaned on the wall and the wall moved! It was like made of painted chipboard or something and so I was like trying not to touch it again incase I like fell through onto the shop floor or something. But seriously, the worst changing room EVER was in Mervyn James, this like, bespoke tailors in Ross, which is like really nice, and then I went to try something on, you pull back this heavy velvet curtain and you're in this barely painted room under the stairs with like a stepladder and paintcans. It was way funny. Oh my god, practically the entire post is about changing rooms...So yeah, and now i'm looking forward to going to re-visit San Marie's tonight for Jess Lambert's birthday party! I shall blog post tomorrow about how it went.I seriously need to start thinking about my costume, I think I shall pirate it up as I have the earring now, and I'm sure i'll be able to conjure up some piratical theme from my wardrobe.

Okay!

Better go!

Lubs lubs lubs

Insomnia and The Lesser Plague

OH MY GOD! That phone seriously wants me dead (we've recently had a second phone connected in the front room and I near pass out whenever it goes off).Anyway, oh god, i fell rough. Admittedly not as rough as previous days but still, rough. I've got this flu from somewhere (Noone knows where) and when it wants to, it literally just makes you cough continually until your eyes and general head throbs. I hate the fact that there are at least fifteen thousand posters around college screaming in red letters "IF YOU HAVE THE VOMITING BUG MAKE SURE YOU GIVE IT FORTY-EIGHT HOURS BEFORE YOU COME BACK INTO COLLEGE!" etc. etc. And like a day after they put them up I started to feel, what can only be described as, dog rough. So I was like "Oh sweet mother of God, this is typical, i catch everything that ever goes around." but no, it wasn't the Big Disease it was the flu (I should really be greatful).So I was abb-sont, as the French say, on Tuesday, Thursday and Friday last week, annoyed that I missed quite a bit of work and socializing, and also missing out on my (reduced sum since last year) £20 EMA. And there's no point in like writing a letter or whatever saying you are ill because it takes them about a hundred and sixty five million centuries for them to like realise it was an authorized absense and that I am worthy of payment. And that is not at all vexing, as it's not like I have to pay for a one hundred and twenty pound A7 piece of card for the bus with that money. But the really hilare thing was: today I recieved a letter in the post with a grid of the week with blue biro ticks under AM and PM for Tuesday, Thursday and Friday stating these 'Unauthorized Absences' were why I wasn't getting my EMA for this week. I love how it like tells you why you aren't getting the EMA as if you wouldn't know.ANYWAY!So yes, this illness is pretty lame-OH.On Sunday night I went to bed at eleven, read 'til about one then attempted sleep. I slept for about an hour as the rest of the time I was coughing. Continually. And it's not like it gets light in the morning so I couldn't tell if my alarm was going to go off any second or I still had three hours to wait. It was seriously bad. But when it finally went off I was surprisingly alive! I was quite active actually (well, as active as you can be at six thirty in the morning).Then at college I thought I was going to be alright! I thought 'It's better to be moving around instead of just lain at home with nan bringing supplies of caffeine and cold and flu tablets whenever it's safe not to overdose'.But I was rough. UBER rough. Plus, I got given the most boring item to draw and inspire me in the entire class and universe - I got a rectangle sheet of metal... Oh also, I'll take this oppurtunity to apologize to like everyone I was just ILL at. Sorrrrreeeee! I was lit just non-stop complaining and just telling random passer-bys how shit the thing I had to draw was - it was bad.Anyway, going home seemed like a good prospect, but on the bus, oh my beegees, it was bad; as soon as I sat down (listening to Cher!!) I was off. Coughing. Plus, to make it worse there were at least nine hundred and seventy six people on the bus and so I had to have my huge (HAND REPAIRED par moi!) military jacket on me, while someone sat next to me, and the heaters were on full blast and I was just a state. [OH MY GOD I thought i'd deleted it all then, PHEW] And you know when you're like polite coughing as so people don't think you're trying to hack up a hairball like *three coughs* *silence* *three coughs* *silence* *three coughs* *silence* then when I got off the bus I was like "COUUUUUUUUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!". It was bad.Anyway, i'd better go.I dunno if i'll be in tomorrow, I thought i'd be alright on Monday but I seriously wasn't, so I probs wont. I haven't had an illness for this long for forever, cough, see you all soon.

LUBS

New Years Resolutions

I have finally decided what my resolutions are

My New Years Resolutions:

1 - Stop being such a slut whore bitch to everyone - last year is SO last season.

2 - Actually learn how to properly socialize with people

3 - Try to be loveable and not cold

4 - Stop being so damn selfish

5 - Stop being so bitter about people and things

6 - Be a generally nicer person - DETOX

The Four Spokes and The Stone Floor

Heyz

God, going down to our free was actually a nightmare today; it was hilare, Lucy, Suzanne and I all had umbrellas, it was totally like that program where they tried out the three different items of the same genre to see how good each one was;Lucy's umbrella is from H&M, at £4.99, it is the most expensive out of the three.Josh's umbrella is from Superdrug, at £2.99 will it survive the gale force winds of Aylestone Hill?Suzanne's umbrella came free with a magazine, how will this giveaway compare to the ones that cost actual money?In third place was my umbrella as it blew inside out countless times and broke four spokes of the metal interior (which were rusting anyway) and hence one side flopped limply without support, lol, it looked tres stupid, I had to bin it and run into H&M to buy a new one. In second place was Lucy's H&M umbrella, although keeping the torrential rain and gusts from her (just about) it also blew inside out frightfully and broke a spoke. At number one, uber-surprisingly is Suzanne's free umbrella which, although was more often inside out than outside out, did not break at all and might "have just been the way she was holding it", ha, they should totally come with instructions on how to use them. I love how umbrellas are only used to light drizzle and slight wind; if the rain is coming down sideways and the wind is hurricane-esque they just wither, soak through and break.After visits to Powerplay and T.K. Maxx Lucy needed to get some clothes to print on from Primark for textiles. God the rain was actually ridiculous, i'm surprised we weren't completely drenched. We entered Primark and started walking up the aisle at which point my foot shot from under me, and I sooooo nearly fell on my behind it was unbelieve, it was so quick I hadn't time to react, ha. Then I noticed the "wet floor" sign, conveniently placed. Why don't they have carpet in there or something? The floor is like stone, I could have totally like cracked my head open in Primark!! Lol, my shoes seriously don't have grip on them though, they are actually bad: mud, wet surfaces, metal and general floor are all fatal to walk on with them.

Okay enough blogging for tonight, I have a new Joni CD to listen to!

Love

Feeding The Dogs Yves Saint Laurent

Hey blog,Well, i've just been upstairs to my bedroom and I have *breathe* cleared out a lot of clothes that have been hanging around for... god, literally a year now, seeing as I went on the "diet" (sarcastically quoted as I literally cut crisps out and ate less and hence lost two and a half stone [crisps were quite a main factor in my diet {very fussy eater}]) in January 2007. God some of those clothes mustered up memories... There was one Ralph Lauren shirt that was like dark blue and I had said "Oh, it looks like an overall!" and five seconds earlier mum had been talking about how everyone had kept saying they thought she was wearing her overalls when she was wearing her new dark blue dress. She didn't look happy.There was that Pierre Cardin suit that I wore to the disaster of an "Ice Ball" where you couldn't hear anyone talking because the music was so loud, there was only dear Hester and my sister to talk to and by the end of the night half of the people were being sick. And there were those vile VILE pictures of me and I just looked god awful - that was when I was at my maximum weight - they have never seen the light of day and never will. EVER.Oh my god! There was that pair of tan trousers that were way expensive and I wore them once - to Sian-Marie's leaving school party and we sat on those railway sleepers that made the flowerbeds and they got oil on them ha! So the we put a stencil design over the marks that didn't wash out but I never wore them again haha! There's a picture of me from two years ago wearing them at the party, before I realised they had been ruined haa, god I look different! I was never into fashion back then and other pictures verify that I am wearing ROUND slip-ons!It's funny how items carry memories isn't it?All of those clothes have been donated to a local charity shop to protect dogs ha!I won't bore my blog with anymore stories about my clothes haha!

Love you all loads

TAT!

Josh

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The Cowboys

Yes! A blog, from moi! It's been over a millenium, blog, it's like... coming home.Well, like the very sane person I am I decided to wear my wonderful Christmas present to college today - My new New Rock cowboy boots. They were perfectly fine when walking around Ross and Hereford and having a little mosey, etc, but when it comes walking up the several thousand verticle miles of Aylestone Hill - it really is no mosey.Half way up the hill, the boots decided to betray me and began to rub my heels like a pair of grinding wheels. I survived the hill, with the emotional support of dear Alithea, and struggled on to the daily round of Sixth Form and onto Art, my ankles near dust by then, but still, I pressed on with dignity, in the name of fashion!!!I asked Jane for several plasters but we became indulged in conversation and she must have forgotten. I asked Tom if he happened to have several plasters, he said he had a fifty pound note and I said some Fendi plasters would've been nicer but it would do, at which he strangely laughed and walked away. And so after a while of walking around in my socks, I braved walking the corridor to the office where I found my saviour whose name I always forget, but she's the nicest lady around and I adore her, and she also needed a plaster after an accident with a jammed piece of metal. So we made our way up the stairs to the principal's office (naturally the only place in the entire college you would find plasters) and are now recovering from our injuries.And so, comes to an end another trivial tale in my life dramaticised only by the way I write!

There may be another tale soon... who knows...

Night children,

xxxxx

Josh

P.S. That picture is me in my cowboy boots taken on a phone, hence: weird. Plus: forehead = cut off because I looked uber malformed
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